Hey we're on the roa....yikes

This post is only a week old and we've communicated broadly that we're now fine, but I still want to preface this with a sentiment: our hearts go out to everyone in the areas affected by the massive earthquake that hit here in Chile, just west of La Serena and Coquimbo. At least 12 people have lost their lives, several towns were destroyed, and from first-hand experience I can tell you it was no joke.

K, so back to the beginning: our last week or so in Santiago was rather uneventful, as we cruised around finding, buying, and searching for more camping equipment. For anyone following in our footsteps: START AT THE BIO BIO FLEA MARKET off the Franklin stop before you go anywhere else. You can find anything there, seriously from Tae Kwon Do gear to old school Ataris and antiques, it's all there. We bought camping gear at a fraction of the store prices, tools for the kombi, and plenty of randomness. We also left a ton of things we would've loved to get folks back at home- sorry Uncle Mike, we didn't have space for those wooden golf clubs and the jade monkey.

In addition, we hot stepped all across Santiago, some days clocking more than 6 miles, searching for 1990 kombi window latches (pestillo, en espanol!), water containers (agua whatevers), and double burner camp stoves (doblisimo ampercamp-say estovos). Once we felt good with supplies we set our departure day for the 16th of September, and got everything all sorted with our baby girl for the road.

FIRST DAY: Our new baby did not let us down: she drove smoothly across hills, valleys, plain, and plateau alike, and although we move much slower than everyone else on the road (averaging about 80kph, or about 50 miles per hour), we were steady as hell. Our girl is a thirsty mistress though, and gets about 8 klicks to the liter, so we found our newest hobby- stopping at nice gas stations to take breaks, pay absurd dollars for gas (a full tank on our girl is about $60 USD), and eat the Chilean national food- Completos, or hot dogs with avocado on them. 

Quick sidebar on Chilean national stuff:

National food = Completo (hot dog)

National anthem = car alarms (wee-ooo-wee-ooo-BARP-BARP-BARP)

National past time = enjoying the wonderful outdoors and then immediately throwing all your trash on the ground and breaking every piece of glass you have so as to ruin this site for anyone else. Chileans have a pyrrhic sense of enjoyment when it comes to nature.  

Anywho, first day went great, we stopped off in Coquimbo and La Serena to buy some supplies and re-fuel on our way into the desert to do some camping. We had just barely parked out in the desert and started cooking dinner, when we felt the ground start to shake. The camp table and stove started to tip over, the food went all over the ground, and the kombi was swaying full tilt from side to side. For any Californians reading, this was Shannon's biggest earthquake, and definitely mine, and we although we laughed it off once it subsided (after minutes, not seconds), we knew that was a big deal. Soon texts and emails and FB messages started to come in telling us that on the other side of the mountain range that hid us, tsunamis were rolling in and literally destroying the towns we were JUST IN. Terrible news, and we have kept those people in our thoughts. Earthquakes are no joke, for real. Nothing funny to say about, just glad we were OK, and thanks to everyone that has kept us in their thoughts.

More to follow on the following days...only one week behind now!

Cars and numeros and cosas and things

DOING MADD UPDATES TONIGHT- THIS POST IS NOW WEEKS OLD (deal with it)

The best part of here (Santiago) so far has been the confrontations with bureaucracy—both because it's defined our purpose thus far of buying a car, but also because it's given us something to talk about with nearly everyone. FOR EXAMPLE (translated from Spanish for YOUR convenience):

Sr. Juan: "What are you doing here?"

Shannon: "Well I'm buying a kombi and driving it all over everywhere without exception."

Sr. Juan: "You mean 'RENT' a kombi, because what you're saying is not possible"

Shannon: "I said "BUY" a Kombi!!!"

 *hits Señor Juan with stone cold stunner and asks him if he can smell what the rock is cooking despite him being knocked out and not great in English*

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This is not what actually transpired at all, quite the opposite, but I hope it relays (in dramatic fashion) what it's like to be here and have but one thing to communicate: ME WANT KOMBI.

Between arriving here and seeing our first pile of rust and house paint and poop (or what Romanians call a "car" apparently), we started the search anew. We scoured websites, newspaper ads, and even the local version of Chilean Craigslist (we found nothing there but I've had plenty of nice massage offers). After many messages, a soon-to-be-friend named José Antonio got back to us and said his kombi was still available and ready for a test drive. 

Long story short = we went there, test drove it, liked it, liked his vibe, still looked at more kombis, took his to a mechanic for technical analysis, decided to buy his.

If you download John Muir's seminal book "How to keep an air-cooled VW alive" then you'll see that "feeling vibes" and "scrooching your butt into" your possible new vehicle is really important. It certainly was for us. We felt good vibes, we scrooched our butts, and had many beers and pisco (chilean liquor) shots with José on the way to making it official and transferring funds for our new baby. What follows is a succinct account of how to get bonafide in Chile and purchase a vehicle as a foreigner:

1) SEO Words to Make this Post Helpful to Foreigners trying to Find, Purchase, Get, Locate, Procure, Ascertain, and otherwise BUY a car, vehicle, auto, kombi, VW in Chile as a foreigner, non-local, or extranjero/alien.

2) Start searching on any of these sites: Yapo.cl, MercadoLibre.cl, El Mercurio, ChileAuto.cl

3) Find vehicle, set up time to take a look-see, test drive it, TAKE IT TO BONAFIDE MECHANIC for a review, then haggle over price

4) As a foreigner, you will need a RUT number (pronounced root, like the Beastie Boy's classic), that will then allow you to make investments and larger purchases, like a house or car, but will NOT allow you to vote- sorry MIchelle Bachelet haters, nice try. To do this, as we've done so as recent as September 2015, you need to:

a) Get a Chilean sponsor to come with you (shout out again to José for being the man and wading through this with us) and write a nice little paragraph about you do not at all plan to murder anyone in Chile

b) Go to the Chilean IRS, called the SII or Servicios Impuestos Internos, and get in line early before 9am to fill out an application together with your sponsor for a RUT

c) Once filled out, get it checked out and then proceed to a Notary (sidebar: notaries in Chile are basically like Judge Wapner, and have PLUSH jobs, I could write an entire post just about their business model...but I definitely won't ever do that). SNAP, I forgot, fill out ALL your RUT papers in BLUE ink...I'm not joking, it sounds nuts but we almost had to re-do everything because I signed something in a black. Notary reviews your papers, stamps them, charges you a few bucks (less than $10 USD) and then you go back to the SII office

d) NOW GO BACK TO SII, show them you're now , then they will print out a handy little paper for you with your new RUT number- congrats, you're basically a one-way Chilean citizen that can only give Chile money, but make none.

e) LAST STEP, go back to notary (NOT the registro civil or DMV as we yanks call it) where they will do a title transfer and charge you the tax on the purcahse- I think around 1.5% of the total value. BOOM, that's it. 

5) Once you're all RUT'd up, you can grab the keys, drive with your temporary RUT number and the old owner's padron (the old title, until yours shows up in the mail weeks later), and cruise all around Chile, but NOT cross borders until your padron is ready with your name on it.

Sheesh, that's a lot. Next post will have us on the road...and it shan't be long before an 8.3 sized disaster strikes (we're doing great).

Somos Chicos Chilenos, AND STUFF

It's hard for me to even write in English anymore, so bear with me por favo...please. Gracias. Just kidding, the Español is still terrible, still speaking a mix of Spanglish/Frenglish and general nonsensery (#DanQuayle2016). Three weeks down and Johnny law still hasn't been able to touch us. The adventure continues...

Last we met, we were in the throes of Chilean cuisine, VW-finding, and overall exploratory pursuits...and not much at all has changed. Well, actually, I recant, much indeed has changed but not much to report back aside from we found, procured, purchased, and now are proud owners of our very own VW kombi.

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Introducing... Lila's Wagen! Or at least until we get to know each other better and we give her another name. 

That's right haters, we did it, so get ready for many kombi pictures, status updates, and many many many more pictures of foreign mechanics with crucial mustaches (#Movember). As my mother always told me, "anyone can drive through random countries in an ill-procured vehicle, but not everyone has the gumption to waste their time getting grifted by sheisty mechanics." LOOK AT ME NOW MA!

Side note: autocorrect only took issue with my use of "sheisty"

K, so down and dirty—we're in Santiago, and the city is still living up to it's official slogan as "South America's Version of Beige". I've implored Shannon to find the men here good looking, I've salted the food beyond normal reason, and I've drunk enough to think it wasn't Coolio's "Gangstas Paradise" AGAIN on the restaurant music selection, but hey—sometimes you can't fake the funk on a nasty dunk. Listen, I been done some traveling in my time, and can say with all honesty that Chileans are as genuinely lukewarm in their everything as they are unimaginative about culture, and that's not such a gosh darn bad thing dontchaknow! My time in Russia was punctuated by bribing officials and fending off unfriendliness, much of Asia was arms length at best, India was very....India (go there, you'll see), and Africa was just about the warmest and friendliest place you could imagine (think Kathy Bates in Fried Green Tomatoes). Santiago is downright OK, in the biggest sense of "OK" you could imagine. Please, anyone else: prove me wrong. 

I've purposefully, in my thinking and writing, kept from extrapolating "Santiago" into "Chile", likewise "Paris" into "France", or "London" into "England" (even though we ALL know England is complete shit, except for London), which is the reason this paragraph will exist. For the Americans reading this, the United States ones, it will come as a real chuck to the chin, an attaboy to the whole Marshall Plan, and all that. You know what? Dictatorships are real bad for culture. You also know what? Cuba, when I visited ten years ago nearly, had more culture going in Havana (1/3 size of Santiago) after decades of communism than this place after a US-approved military coup. Here in Chile, the smarties were exiled, assassinated, or killed. The arties went to Germany or the US and did some amazing things. The best and the brightest were car bombed. Education was oppressed, the military took over, and basically nothing above average happened for 20+ years. I feel this in the food, the art, the culture, the people, the embraces here...it's systemic, and it's dangerously mediocre.  

All that said, AND STUFF, you guys—I recommend coming down here for the same reason I recommend going anywhere. See things. Meet people. Experience a post-dictatorship country. Just do! That will be good enough for when you are being a human-doing. Make that choice and be a fundamental, awesome, existentialist without all the preoccupying baggage. 

NEXT POST, we'll talk about cars and engines and numbers and stuff...

Bienvenidos a La Vega (Or How We Learned Our Spanish Sucks)

Before we began this trip, we dreamed of all the delicious food we'd be eating. Savory meats, fresh seafood, rice, beans, empanadas, etc. But the morning of our third day in Santiago we had already eaten in a handful of restaurants and hadn't been wowed by the food. Finally we talked with our housemates and learned that if we were waiting for that pinnacle gastronomic moment where we look at each other across the table and mumble "oh my god" before even swallowing the first bite, well, it wasn't going to happen. Turns out Chile isn't know for their culinary prowess. After all, one of the more famous dishes is a hot dog covered in mayonnaise.

So after spending way too much money on our third or fourth so-so meal, we determined that buying groceries and cooking at home was the way to go. And what better way to get to know Santiago than a trip to La Vega, the famous open air market!

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If you're reading a little trepidation in Danny's face, it's because La Vega covers 3 city blocks!

Knowing at least a little about what we were undertaking in visiting La Vega, we decided to stroll around first to get a feel for the market before buying anything. Turns out this is not at all a good strategy. No sooner had we spotted something that we liked (we'll come back for it later! we thought) than we lost it amidst the endless aisles and crowded stalls bustling with buyers, vendors, carts, and occasionally, an actual car. It wasn't until we left that we noticed the aisles did have numbers on them so you could find your way.

It was an exhausting trip though. And man did we underestimate our Spanish skills. We both thought that for the most part things would sound familiar and thus trigger the release of 10 years of Spanish education, but no. Chile has the most difficult accent in all of South America (go figure) and tons of strange expressions that make zero sense to foreigners, even ones fluent in Spanish. And if Chilean Spanish is the worst, then the Spanish in La Vega is the worst in Chile. Of course we learned these things after we made it home with our bags of groceries so we didn't feel as bad about how much we had struggled through our shopping trip but still. We also had a brain fart moment converting kilograms to pounds and ended up with almost 2.25 pounds of cheese...

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The freshest fruit, veggies, meat, and seafood in Santiago. And much cheaper than the supermarket.

All in all, we've been eating most of our meals at home and feel like we're settling in nicely to our new neighborhood. Ahora nosotros tenemos que practicar nuestro Español. 

Note: At the time of this post we are about halfway through our 2.25 pounds of cheese. 

Arriving In CHI-CHI-CHI-LAY-LAY-LAY

PHEW, we landed safely! (Last Tuesday...we know, we'll get better at posting regularly, promise.) And apologies to anyone who took the under on us actually doing this, at a very respectable +250 odds, I can't actually blame you. Anyone who parlayed "10 years of middle school + high school + college Spanish classes won't add up to shit", well congrats, your ship has just come in amiger....amigon, amigo. 

In the past week, we took a plane from beautiful Orlando, home of Harry Potter world, my beautiful family (and winners of Harmony's infamously tough trivia night), and reluctant alligators, all the way to Santiago, Chile. Not a bad flight all told, but a disturbing amount of pressure was put on us to watch Big Bang Theory on the airplane—NOT the first time this has happened to me (see: the time on a plane when a marine forced me to watch an episode and then called me "gay" for not enjoying it). I digress...it's a really easy flight down here, you should do it and watch whatever you feel like watching!

We took an uber-like taxi to our B&B, which is exactly like renting a room from an artist in his house and pretty darn comfortable for USD $15/night. We love it here, and would recommend Bellavista Home to anyone visiting Santiago. There's even a place called "Montana Steakhouse" five minutes walking, so us Americans that value Montana will feel right at home. The house is great, the neighborhood is great, the subway is great...Santiago is a really soft landing actually. The one thing we could never have counted on though was that, like, everyone here speaks Spanish and they throw that in our face constantly.

Right away (second day) we visited the VW Kombi that we thought, hoped. and prayed would be our newest family member/home for the next few years. We'd been communicating with a German/Romanian couple who were trying to sell it down here, and all signs looked positive. What can I say that hasn't been said before a thousand times, "don't buy a classic Volkswagen bus from a Romanian couple in South America yadda yadda yadda..." You know the rest. The bus lacked hutzpah, but made up for it in rust—which is good for oxidation fans but bad for aforementioned buyers of said bus. The deposit we put down was chalked up to sunk cost (#thanksobama), and so the search continues. It is also important to note that the entire (retrospectively funny) meeting with Señor Juan, the mechanic, was conducted with lots of gesticulating and signing, and usage of Google Translate which definitely works sort of sometimes for a couple things. 

Post too long...continue on to the next to find out whether Chile has good local cuisine, sewage systems that can handle toilet paper, or stray dog policies (hint: none of those things, but it's a great city!). 

Oh, and Chi-chi-chi-lay-lay-lay is the Chilean National Team chant. You're welcome. 

A (Love) Letter From Danny

"We went from here to there," and that's a story we all know well enough. Besides visiting vistas, seeing scenes, and playing on playas, I want to describe a journey where people are met, situations are encountered, odd trivia bits are discovered, and lots and lots and lots of happiness happens.

In this tale, there's going to be confusion, delight, insanity, and hopefully (most often) big 'ol exploding high fives of good vibes and sentiments. And somewhere in between, some helpful, proper tips on just how to do the how and answers to why we're doing this whole thing. You can check out our first couple of posts for details on our pre-trip adventures, but just to recap our last couple of months:

NYC > Baltimore > CHI > Baltimore > LA > NYC > Baltimore > Tampa > Orlando > Santiago

There. To those that housed us over the last months, I want to offer FREE camping space to you all, including (in chronological order), Peg and Joe Cronyn, Ryan Archer Kelly, Drew Brownell, Steph, John and Laurel Hunzicker, Paige and Cedric Volk, Angela Patriarca, Sean and Jess King, Colby and Nikki Young, Jake and Amy Burns, Shahla Fatemi and Alex Nelson, Tim O'Bryan and Mike Belknap, Grandma and Grandpa Honey, and finally Sally and Mike Magruder. Please redeem your free camping space whenever you feel like being exactly where we are in South America (relative value ~1,000,000 Zimbabwean).

Safe to say, we love you all, and we love that we have such amazing family and friends—without which none of this would be imaginable or possible. Truly, you all are our present, not simply past or future and you are with us always. To everyone we didn't see, you owe us a visit or risk us completely forgetting about you (relative value about 1.5 million zimbawean). Kidding, obviously. We're just sore that we missed you. 

That concludes pre-trip thanks, next post to follow on where we currently are, and cliffhangers abound! Did we make it safely here, or did our plane crash and are our ghosts currently writing this?! Find out next post!

Leaving On A Jet Plane

After criss-crossing the country for a few weeks, our bags did eventually get packed for our trip. Painful? Yep. Did we pack too much? Probably. Our reasoning was that we’re moving into a van and therefore we wouldn’t need to actually carry all our belongings on our back. But first we had two more stops to make.

4 checked bags and 4 carry-ons...whew.

With just under a week left before we fly to Santiago, we took our last respite with family in Florida. We spent a relaxing couple of days with Shannon's grandparents in Tampa then drove back to Kissimmee to spend our final days in the States with Danny's aunt and uncle.

Tampa Day 1

Before heading to Shannon's grandparents in Sun City Center, we stopped for dinner with Shannon's uncle Tim and learned that restaurants in Florida are enormous, especially when they are connected to the Bass Pro Shop next door. After dinner, we arrived at Shannon's grandparents' house to be greeted by Kimo, their enthusiastic Maltese puppy, and yet another dinner! To say we ate well those few days is an understatement.

Kiss me you fool!

Tampa Day 2 and 3

The next couple of days we tried to work off some of the food with workouts at the Sun City fitness center, relaxed by the pool, and had two more wonderful dinners with family. We also noted that Florida has the biggest Walmarts and gorgeous sunsets.

Shopping with G Honey. 16 full floor to head height freezers of ice cream at the Sun City Walmart...we're American and we're still stunned by it. 

Kissimmee Day 4

On Saturday, we made the drive from Tampa to Kissimmee to visit Danny's aunt and uncle. We joined in for their weekly trivia night and helped the team get their first win! 

Our contributions? Danny got Robert Downey Jr. for top 3 highest past actors in the past 3 years and Shannon got Uggs for an Australian company specializing in boots and footwear. 

Kissimmee Day 5

After a much needed morning sleeping in, we hopped in the car to to experience one of Florida's premier attractions—airboats! These things are seriously loud and seriously fun. The wildest part is flying over what looks like land (it isn't, it's lily pads and water grasses). 

Uncle Mike and Danny doing it up Florida style. 

Later that afternoon, we headed out to Melbourne for a late lunch and then the beach for a swim in the Atlantic. Just two weeks before, we were swimming in the Pacific!

Just love the East Coast beaches with the dunes and grass.

Kissimmee Day 6

Which brings us to our last full day in the States where we had the most magical experience of all—a trip to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter!!! While a bit jarring to wander around Hogsmeade in 95 degree weather while looking at snow and eating heavy winter food (think Shepherd's Pie and turkey legs), it did not disappoint! 

Yes, we're smiling, but inside we're wishing for the snow to be real.

We spent most of the day in the Harry Potter land riding the Dragon Challenge roller coasters (if you go, the Chinese Fireball is more fun) and the Forbidden Journey ride (don't worry if the wait is long since you'll want that time to enjoy the stunning detail inside Hogwarts), before exploring Jurassic Park and the Marvel Universe. Of course we decided to keep the wet rides until the end (never underestimate those log rides with the drop at the end) which meant a soggy car ride home, but we were happy and exhausted. 

After pizza dinner with Danny's family, this time including his cousin and his cousin's wife, we headed home to check the last few things off our list before our flight to Santiago. That's right, our next post will be from South America—finally! 

All in all, we were incredibly grateful to have these few weeks in the States to make some sweet memories with awesome people. And now we're ready for whatever adventure is coming next. See you on the other side!

Pre-Trip Planning And The Farewell Tour

On our first date, one of the things that drew us together was a love of travel. So, from the beginning, an extended trip was a dream of ours. The dream took a lot of hard work, saving, and planning. But we did it and now we’re on our way!

Find it at Tony's Baltimore Grill

The adventure began on June 27th, 2015 with us moving out of the Brooklyn apartment we called home for 3 and a half years. Our itinerary over the following weeks was planned around Danny’s teaching schedule, visiting family, and friends. Since we left Brooklyn, we’ve slept in 13 different beds and traveled 8,346 miles- and we haven’t even left the States yet!

Reflections at the Bean in Chicago.

So what exactly is our plan? We wanted to go on a grand road trip around South America so Danny started an intense search for a VW kombi for us to call home. We'll tell that story another day, but suffice it to say our "new" VW is waiting for us in Santiago, Chile. We'll land in Santiago on August 19th and spend a few weeks waiting for the paperwork to go through, learning Spanish, and exploring the city and surrounding areas. Once our kombi is ready to go, we'll head south to Patagonia!

Just missing mom, the photographer!

That's all we've got so far and, of course, all our plans are subject to change. But the main thing is that we’re keeping ourselves pathologically open to the universe. As loose as our itinerary is, some of the things we're looking forward to are camping, working on farms, volunteering where we can, becoming fluent in Spanish, dancing together, and even rolling some jiu-jitsu.

We fly to Santiago on August 18th, but first we've got two more stops to make!

Hello world!

Welcome to Project Roam—Danny and Sh@n1's collection of photos, stories, and musings from the road. First stop? Santiago, Chile!